


Tins of Oysters

by Blanksandwich



Category: Friends at the Table (Podcast)
Genre: F/F, Gen, Millie and Leap being best friends, Pirates, Swordfighting, alcohol mention, spoilers for episode 38 of Partizan
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-01
Updated: 2021-02-01
Packaged: 2021-03-18 18:48:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,144
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29122935
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blanksandwich/pseuds/Blanksandwich
Summary: Leap and Millie do piracy. Swordfighting and shenanigans occur.Secret Samol gift for @jesspretend on twitter!
Relationships: Ver'million Blue & Exeter Leap, Ver'million Blue/Si'dra
Comments: 1
Kudos: 3





	Tins of Oysters

Millie stared into her duffle bag, mentally reviewing everything she would need for this trip.   
Tooth brush? Check.   
Change of clothes? Check.   
Saline? Check.   
Sick sunglasses? Booze? Explosives, courtesy of Broun? Check, check, and check. 

She zipped up the bag and shrugged into her jacket. 

“All packed up?” Millie turned around to see Si’dra walk into her room.

“I think I have everything, yeah.” She hefted the bag onto her shoulder. “Are you sure you’ll be okay without me on perimeter?”

“Somehow I’ll manage.” Si’dra said. “Even if you are an invaluable asset.” They crossed the room to her, straightening her lapels. “Besides, if they can’t handle you being gone for a few days, then how do you expect them to handle you going offmoon?”

Millie grinned. “Good point.”

They stood on their toes and Millie leaned forward to kiss them. The two of them stood in the doorway of the room for a moment before they broke away. Si’dra squeezed Millie’s hands. 

“Go have fun. You deserve it!” they said. “And tell Leap I say hello.”

“Will do!” said Millie, and headed off towards the docks.

===

Millie adjusted her grip on the strap of her bag and peered across the water. Leap was not a punctual person in general, but he was later than usual. It was weird that she couldn't even see his ship anywhere. She was so intent on the horizon that she almost lost her balance on the end of the dock as the water surged upwards. Millie slid backwards, reaching for her RUNT as a black tower rose from the water in front of the dock. Confusion gave way to delight as the top of the tower opened and Leap poked his head out, waving enthusiastically.

“Millie! Avast!” he yelled. He climbed out and balanced on the hull of the submarine.

“Leap! Where the fuck did you get a submarine?” Millie said as she clambered down, wrapping him in a tight hug. He hugged her back until a wave crashed onto the deck, soaking Millie’s shoes. She hopped backward almost falling into the ocean for the second time in as many minutes,“Shit!”

Leap steadied her, laughing a bit. “You know, I thought you’d be less of a land-lubber than this.”

“Be less of a what?”

“Land-lubber, it’s like pirate slang for someone who isn’t a sailor.” Leap said.

“You have been watching too many old vids, Leap. You sound like a nerd.”

“And you sound like a scurvy dog.”

“I don’t think Apostolisians can get scurvy.” 

The two of them climbed down the hatch in the forward fin, and stepped into a hall painted a perfect corporate grey. Leap led Millie through the anonymous corridor until they came to the helm. The personality void that was Orion interior design was marred by a massive Millenium Break symbol painted on the floor. Spreading out in all directions from it, along consoles and up onto the ceiling, were vines and animals and curling waves. Crouched on the ground, painting curving sprigs of Russian Sage on the wall, was a human with short, grey hair. They were intent on their task, carefully adding purple buds to the end of the stems. Leap cleared his throat, and the human glanced over at him before tucking the paintbrush behind an ear and standing up. 

“Captain.” They nodded. “Who’s this?”

“Millie, this is Upper Crust. Crust, this is Ver’million Blue.”

“Nice to meet you.” said Crust. They almost succeeded at acting exactly as disaffected as they had been when Millie had walked in, but their eyes had widened ever so slightly when Leap had introduced Millie. Millie felt a mixture of pride and embarrassment at being well known even in parts of Millenium Break she had never been to before.

“Yeah, you too.” said Millie.

“Crust pilots the sub, and they’re gonna take us back to my ship.” Leap explained.

“Your ship?” Millie asked.

“You didn’t really think I was gonna have you spend your whole visit in this tube? No offense, Crust.”

“None taken.”

Millie plopped into a chair and propped her feet up on a console. Crust pushed her legs off unceremoniously and began piloting the sub. Leap settled onto a bench across from her. They watched the weird fish in the Prophet’s Sea through the front window.

“You didn’t answer my question, where’d you get this sub?” Millie asked after she got bored of looking out the window.

“Stole it.” Leap replied.

Millie stared at him for a second and then broke out laughing. “You know what I meant!”

“Sure, sure. I stole it from an Orion fleet.” Leap said glibly.

“Okay but how? Like, how did you get on board?”

“You remember that scuba equipment from when we stormed Icebreaker?" Leap trailed off, grinning at her. 

Millie considered the implications of that statement. “What, really?” she said.

“No, we waited until it docked and then snuck on board. That would’ve been way cooler though.”

“I didn’t realize you’d gotten boring in retirement.” Millie said, and Leap pretended to look offended. She started to say something else when the sub shuddered to a halt. 

“We’re here.” Crust said. “Thank you for sailing with us.”

Leap leapt up from his seat, grabbing Millie’s hand and pulling her along with him. 

“Come on! I have a surprise for you,” he said.

They exited the sub.

“Behold!” Leap cried waving his arms, “The Life Everlasting!”

The ship was massive. It managed to look simultaneously sleek and ostentatious. It had massive white sails, decks upon decks, and a huge curved fin that extended below the water. Millie leaned out and squinted at it as she climbed the ladder up the side.

Millie was quiet for a moment. 

“Why does your ship have stained glass windows?” she asked. “Doesn’t that make it slower?”

“I don’t know, man. It was like that when I found it.”

People waved hello to Leap as he led her across the deck. He introduced crewmates to her, the quartermaster, Cas’iopeia, the first and second mates, Clarion Call and Judge’s Vow, and the navigator, SH-03. 

Leap opened a low wooden door with a sign that said “Captain Leap’s Quarters: Enter at Your Own Risk” into a tight little room absolutely filled with stuff. There were piles of prepackaged snack food, a nest of blankets and clothes, and kitschy tourist trinkets on every surface. Millie was surprised that Leap was such a packrat, although she had never actually seen him in his own space now that she thought about it. Even on Icebreaker, Leap had been full of nervous energy, and his room had been poorly organized but sparse. Seeing Leap amidst his collection of random junk, it was like he was in context for the first time. Exeter Leap in his natural habitat. Leap was energetic as he moved easily between the piles of stuff, but, for the first time since she had met him, he wasn’t antsy. He seemed happy. Comfortable.

Millie picked up a stuffed seal wearing a sarong that said “Visit Obelle!” and raised an eyebrow at Leap. He grinned back and shrugged before diving into the piles of stuff. He rooted around for a few minutes, unearthing a steamer trunk, which he flung open. Millie looked over his shoulder into the trunk, catching a glimpse of black velvet and silver buttons as Leap whipped out a long black pirate coat and handed it to her. He piled clothes into her arms, topping the stack off with a cavalier hat with a peacock feather. 

“You get changed, and I’ll meet you on the quarterdeck.” Leap said and ducked out of the room.

“Leap wait, I don’t know where that is-” but Leap was already gone. Millie sighed, deconstructed the pile in her arms, and began to get dressed. 

===

“Okay, I’m not gonna lie, this is pretty sick.” Millie walked up to Leap in her new pirate duds. “I particularly like the hat.”

“Thanks, I picked it out myself.”

“Is there any particular reason you wanted me to dress like I’m from Hieron?” She scrunched up her face. “Boo! I’m a zombie pirate!”

“We’re both dressed up.” Leap said, gesturing to his own long coat and tricorn hat. “Also, zombies don’t say ‘boo’.”

“Oh that’s a costume? I thought that was just how you dressed now.”

“Rude. I wanted you to have the full, immersive experience, and this is the thanks I get. Anyway,” he continued, “we’re gonna do some piracy, Millie! I have a nice Nidean transport all picked out. Soft target. Should be some contraband and some supplies for Millenium Break too.” Leap clapped his hands together. “I have one more thing for you.” He turned to the railing and picked up a long, thin package then turned back around and handed it to Millie. Millie unwrapped the package to reveal a curved sword hanging from a belt. She drew the scimitar and swished it around, grinning. 

“This is also pretty sick,” she said, sheathing the sword and strapping on the belt. “How long until we reach the transport.”

“We should be coming up on it pretty soon.” 

"Captain!" An Apostolisian ran up to Leap, Cas’iopeia, Millie remembered.

“Cas’iopeia, what’s up? Are we approaching the target?”

“Uh, yes, but, well, The Decagon is already here,” cas said.

“What? How is that possible?” Leap said, running to the side of the boat, and holding up a spyglass. 

Millie followed him. “Wait what’s happening?”

“Okay so you remember how there’s a bunch of Orion guys who want to rebel, but in a gross corporate way?” Leap asked as he glared across the ocean. 

“Yeah?”

“So some of them I guess heard about the fleet, and they stole my idea!”

Millie laughed a little in spite of herself. “I don’t know if you invented the concept of piracy, Leap.”

“No, but I perfected it.” he shot back. “The problem is they keep tailing us and trying to use the confusion to steal what we already stole.” He swore as he scanned the horizon. “But how did they get in front of us? Cas’iospeia, prepare for combat and get us up to speed.”

“Aye Captain!” cas ran off across the deck.

Millie squinted against the glare on the waves, and Leap handed her his telescope, pointing to a spot on the horizon. Millie trained the spyglass on it and saw what he had seen. There was a massive Nidean container ship, painted like a pinball machine, with too many colorful lights for Millie’s taste. Swarming around it were ten smaller boats, in a variety of inoffensive shades of grey and beige. The ships were really nothing compared to The Life Everlasting, but there were a lot of them. The ship began to pick up speed as they neared the target and Millie watched as it pitched up onto the fin she had seen before, the bottom of the ship suspended above the waves. The wind whipped through her hair as Leap let out a whoop beside her. 

“Ready harpoons!” ordered Leap. 

As they sped through the center of the group of enemy pirates, he yelled, “Fire!”

Millie watched as hooked spears sped off in every direction. The air filled with the sound of whirring cables. The harpoons embedded themselves in the side of the ships, pulling them off course as The Life Everlasting sped by. A final harpoon attached to the cargo ship, yanking the ship into a turning stop. All around them boarding parties slid down cables to board the other ships. Leap whirled around beside her, scanning the ship decks with his spyglass.

“What are you looking for?” Millie cried over the sounds of tactical ziplines being deployed.

“Her!” Leap called and pointed. On the prow of the largest of the Orion ships stood another person in an old fashioned pirate get up. She glared down at Leap and flourished with her sword. Leap drew his own swords and ran for the cable that attached to her ship, Millie chasing after him. He swung up onto the cable and held a hand out to Millie, who grabbed it and then the handhold. They sped dangerously close to the surface of the Prophet’s Sea and towards the other pirate LARPer, Millie’s RUNT bobbing along behind them.

“So, who is she?” Millie asked as they landed on the deck. 

“She’s--”

An Orion pirate leapt at them and Leap fended them off with his sword, as he and Millie turned into the fray. Millie and Leap circled the deck heading towards the prow. Another pirate came at Leap’s back and Millie blocked his attack and slashed him across the chest. They watched each other’s backs as they made their way up to the prow of the boat. The Orion pirate captain smiled at them. 

“Exeter Leap, to what do I owe the singular pleasure?” she said

“Shut up, Viceroy. How’d you find us?”

“Skipping the pleasantries I see. How rude.” she looked over at Millie. “Who’s your friend?”

Leap didn’t bother answering that question. He swung his swords towards her, one low and one high, but she leapt out of the way. Viceroy swiped at Leap with her rapier, and he parried it pushing her off balance. Viceroy was on the back foot now and he pressed his advantage swinging his swords forward gleefully. Leap seemed to have this fight in hand so Millie fought some of the other Orion pirates, working her way across the ship. Leap was surprisingly good at sword fighting, and he seemed to be enjoying himself, he could manage for a little while. She heard a shout behind her and turned just in time to catch another pirate’s sword against her own. Her opponent had overextended and Millie twisted his arm over her shoulder and tossed him into the sea below. She scaled the mast of the ship, tossing down enemy pirates and swinging her scimitar through the ropes. 

Once she had ousted the last pirate from the crow’s nest, she checked in on Leap and his rival. Leap seemed to be winning and she was so distracted by his energetic fighting that she almost missed Viceroy’s left hand reaching towards her belt. Towards a pistol on her belt, Millie realized. Millie whipped her rifle out of her RUNT, lined up a shot and fired, knocking the pistol out of Viceroy’s hand and into the sea, even as she drew it. Both Viceroy and Leap watched the arc of the pistol as it landed in the water and then back at each other. Viceroy grinned sheepishly, and Millie could see Leap’s body language shift from almost playful to deadly serious. Leap glanced up at Millie, tracing the shot, and Viceroy took that opportunity to dive over the side of the ship, vanishing from sight. Millie scanned waves and saw her surface and climb onto one of the other ships. The Decagon fleet quickly turned and fled across the waves and out of sight. Leap’s crew turned their attention to the cargo ship, swarming up the cables. It looked like Viceroy and her crew hadn’t gotten much farther than stopping the Nidean ship, leaving the plunder for them. 

Millie slid down the mast and landed next to Leap, quickly checking him over for injuries. 

“I’m fine, I’m fine.” Leap protested. 

“She almost shot you, Leap.”

“Well, in fairness to me, she’s never tried to do that before.” 

“Some people take deadly sword fights seriously.”

“Can’t relate.” he looked around. “This is Viceroy’s personal ship, I bet she has some pretty cool stuff on here.”

“You cannot distract with cool shit, Leap.” Millie said, but he was already opening the door to the captain’s quarters.

“Oh my god Millie you have to look at this. Where did she even get this stuff? A combination Deep Dish Steakhouse and bowling alley?”

===

Millie and Leap flopped back onto their newly stolen sofa and stared up at the stars. The Sphinx was rising in the north, signalling the start of summer.

Millie picked at a piece of glow-in-the-dark brocade. “This really is the worst thing I’ve ever seen.” 

“Nope,” said Leap

“What do you mean ‘Nope’? You don’t know what I have or haven’t experienced!”

“I know you’ve seen Clementine debate, and that was definitely worse than this stupid couch.”

Millie cackled at that. “Also I saw that awful tux you wore to the funeral.”

Leap laughed. “God, that thing was fucking ugly.”

“Sure was.”

They lapsed into companionable silence, passing a bottle of stolen champagne between them. Millie took a swig and glanced at her friend. He was so relaxed, the aperture of his eye mostly closed, head tilted back. Millie fixed her eyes resolutely on the stars.

“I’m not coming back, you know.” she said.

“Huh?” Leap sounded confused. She heard him turn towards her, but she kept looking up. 

“I’m not coming back, from space, I mean. I’m not coming back to Partizan.”

Leap said nothing. Millie felt guilt start to coil in her gut. They had been having so much fun.

Why did she have to ruin it?

“Well, obviously.” Leap said.

Now it was Millie’s turn to be confused. “What?”

“Why would you come back here? No offense to this moon, or whatever, but Partizan kind of sucks.”

“But, your fleet… Aren’t you happy here?” she asked.

“Don’t get me wrong, this is fun. But eventually I want to get back to my roots. Do piracy the old-fashioned way.” He gestured at the sky. “In space.”

That made Millie laugh in spite of herself. She turned back to her friend.

“Look, Mils, I always assumed that we’d meet up out there, wherever you’ve started your little life and I’d get to, like, lay low from the space cops at your farm. Meet the wife and 12 cats you're definitely going to have.”

Millie shoved him lightly. “Don’t bring the space cops to my farm, Leap. That’s inconsiderate.”

“The whole point of laying low is avoiding the space cops, Millie. Were you even paying attention?”

They dissolved into bickering about whether or not there would be any space cops or “spops” as Leap started calling them, involved in their futures. 

Millie looked again at the Sphinx. The Principality’s constellations twinkled above her. Millie had seen these stars her whole life. On every planet she’d ever been on. For a while it had been almost comforting, knowing she and her friends in other units would always look up and see the same constellations. No matter what planet, the Sphinx would rise at the beginning of summer and set at its end. Millie knew it then. She was going to get off this world, out from under this unchanging, smothering sky and Leap would too.

Someday they’d see each other again, under different stars than these, and they would be free.


End file.
